- Posted by drodriguez
- On February 4, 2019
So often it is the first thing I look for in others and the last thing I want others to see in me. Why is that? Probably cause I’ve made up stories about not being enough or being too much – all stemming from a fear of being unlovable. “If they see the real me,” I’ll think, “they’ll know I’m not significant.” It’s insane how often our stories run us and color our experiences. Leading up to this #Friendsgiving I was admittedly a little anxious. I knew one person. One. The idea of being in a room full of strangers mortified the introverted analyzer in me ? And I showed up anyways. Cause I’m not committed to my old story anymore. I’m committed to authenticity, intimacy, and commUNITY. I choose to believe (and thereby create) that I’m safe and significant. This means that I get to show up to my commitments even when my ego tries to convince me that I’m neither safe nor valuable. *insert uncomfortable freak out here* So as I arrived to the party, I parked my car, took a deep breath, and whispered: “Don’t puff up your chest or put your head down. Show up authentically and allow yourself to be seen.” (Yep. I give myself pep talks. Only. All. The. Time.) Then I walked in. And I experienced a beautiful evening filled with connection, laughter, and just the right amount of awkwardness. If I had listened to my stories though, I wouldn’t have created this. I would’ve had more of the same. So I’m grateful for my tribe and I’m grateful for love. I’m grateful for the breakdowns that have begotten my transformation. It’s been these lessons that have allowed me to shift out of being my greatest critic to being my greatest ally. And from this space, as you can see, anything is possible. ?✌??